DREAM



  I walk on and on.I do not know why I am going.Or where I am going I walk on because my mind is commanding me to. My heart is throbbing,I feel restless.Something is heavy in my mind .But impulsively I walk on.

Suddenly a dark,thick forest rises in the distance,welcoming me with its numerous trees and shrubs.Though it is somewhat frightening,I walk on and soon am amidst this dark forest.The trees stand waving their branches,as if to welcome me.Amongst their shadows,the sun occasionally shows off its inquisition by peeping through the thick leaves.And when there is a strong gust of wind ,it sees me in full and gives a radiant smile.

Even this does not cheer me and I walk on.Then I come to a meadow.A small creek runs gurgling over small rocks,happily whistling on its way.I am still melancholic,realise I am all alone in this wild forest.A shiver runs through my spine.I must go back.I try to hasten back.

But now my memory fails me-from where did I come from?Where to return now? I try to run but my legs are weak and I can only limp.I sweat,I cry and

I wake up to realise this is only a dream.
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I was a teenager when I wrote this.The diary's pages are crumbling.I have salvaged what I could ,in the manner I thought was right.

         
 My "blogs" of a different kind


On contemplating serious matters such as the existence of God, I feel perplexed.I somehow donot understand the inveterate practices so reverently followed by almost all sections of people,be they great or small. When I hear grandiloquent speeches on the glories of God,I never fully appreciate them,for I feel they lack depth and sincerity,leave me wondering "Are these great men who give such ornate orations ,adorned   with  high sounding phrases,as intellectual as they pose to be?Can they give extemporaneous  speeches,on the Lord they praise and worship in a heartfelt, simple manner, which will touch the simple people they address to,understand better?"

My attitude towards religion is different and those who glorify age old ,pompous religious practices may scorn at my views.I am not an apostate nor am I a theist the way people define that word.I believe in a supreme power that  reigns over us,some call God and I call it destiny.I am not able to comprehend the concept of confining this power in a small space and declare that is ITS domain.Maybe someday,these advocates of idolatry will be able to understand what I say.
               
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Yeah ,this was a very young girl's view to be different and daring!Yet she could  not be much different because of the pressures of the society she lived in.Without compromising much,yet bowing down to dear and near ones' sentiments,she has successfully held on to certain of her values.

Above was an entry in a diary I had kept in my late teens.It is amazing that my views have remained the same though I might have been pliable on occasions lest I hurt the dear and near ones around me.Ah,yes,I would now use much simpler words,less rigid in my views!
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Blogging

 I set out on this seemingly wonderful journey of "Blogging",with imaginations of penning down regularly all my experiences,establishing worthy contacts on the way,spending some interesting hours in a hobby which would keep me fruitfully occupied.Yes,all these are true indeed but why is that I don't bring myself to do this more often?

Starting from my teenage years,I have kept diaries- never recording my day to day mundane activities but more as a vent to my emotions and in the absence of a close,dear friend in whom I could pour out my innermost thoughts,my diary served this void,it became my soulmate.Pages and pages of a silly girl's silly thoughts do not deserve to be treasured even by people who dote on her and alas! some masterpieces were lost,some torn up and thrown into wastepaper bins by the author herself! Some which escaped this unholy treatment,survived years in attics,in some cartons,dusty &worn out probably because of some important landmark event,which made me hesitate a bit to shred them and found their way into some forgotten corner.But when opened years later still brought some happiness recollecting events of a bygone era.

Then came the computers,the NET & transformed our lives.Some of us did not understand the nittygritties of this electronic age.Were taught again and again by our youngsters, only to get totally muddled ,much to the consternation of the young teachers,who were aghast with such ignorance-why are people so thorough in their fractions and decimals,not able to grasp minor concepts?Yea,slowly I did learn,now atleast to blog.All the nonsense  that I feel  odd to share with someone,the things that I am not sure that anyone will be willing to listen to,I can now put down in a blog.But are they really unseen?Like my old diaries? There maybe a few who snigger at such trivia .But I don't care,I can't see them, right?!